Choosing celibacy was one of my best decisions. At the time of making the decision, I was still engraved into a life of sex and seduction. I didn't know all that would come out of it, but I was willing to embark on the journey with God.
Today, you see a vibrant young woman that speaks to women on singleness, faith, and fashion. When I decided to walk in celibacy I was not the woman I am today. I did not have this faith nor drive. I just wanted to believe that something better was waiting for me. At the time I thought marriage would come quicker if I become celibate, but God had something far more beneficial to my life and the life of others.
Going through the first 6 months of celibacy was challenging. I still had many of my old ways about me and it crushed me when men wouldn't openly pursue me. It made me feel unattractive which led to many deeply rooted insecurities. Celibacy allowed me to get the healing I really needed. I needed internal healing from past hurts, lovers, and mistakes.
Year 1 I called it the deliverance season. Every other day I was getting delivered from more ungodly views and hurts that still plagued my heart.
Year 2 was the year I was bold with my celibacy. Not pulling any punches with men that tried to pursue and I even spoke up about it more. I chose to create videos for women that will show them another way of celibacy and see how God says go for it.
I never knew that when I chose celibacy it would eventually impact the lives of others. I never knew all the healing I needed until I embarked on this journey. I never knew God would sustain me this long through it all. I never knew He had all this planned. I never knew God would use my mistakes to shine light into the lives of others. I never knew that God was this faithful. I never knew He was that in control.
Now I am getting ready to embark on Year 3 of celibacy and I am eager and excited to see all the amazing lessons I learn along the way.
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