When Your Answered Prayers Feel Heavy

Man, I thought this season would feel different.

That’s the thought that came to mind as I sat in my ministry’s office. Honestly, I am standing in so many answered prayers. But somehow, I don’t feel as blessed because I thought this season would feel different.

As I sat here reflecting, I wondered, what did you imagine? I guess I imagined the blessing, the joy—just sunshine and rainbows. However, there have been many long days, an achy back, a long list of tasks, and constant areas where I feel like I have to learn something new just to be a better leader. Maybe it’s more like a hamster on a wheel—running, and never quite at ease.

In all of this, I realized that under heaven, there is a season for everything. Yes, I may have to run more now to experience calm later. A mother of a newborn will miss out on sleep now, but in a few short months, she will have a calmer routine. A new business owner may have to burn the midnight oil, working after their 9–5 to make their dreams a reality, but it’s only for a time.

Still, I wondered why this didn’t feel the way I had hoped and dreamed it would.

And I realized, because it was never meant to feel that way.

If it did, I wouldn’t lean into prayer so deeply. If all the accounts were overflowing, I wouldn’t be so dependent. If my plate were empty, then the things I prayed for wouldn’t be there at all. My full plate is a reflection of God’s grace and faithfulness. My busy evenings filled with connection and my weekends at the office are the result of answered prayers. The husband I come home to every evening adds to my busyness, but I wouldn’t want it any other way. The ministry office I walk into every weekend morning adds responsibility and financial pressure at times, but I wouldn’t want it any other way.

The truth is, the very thing we complain about most is often the very thing we prayed for.

I asked God to use me in ministry, and He answered. I asked God for a companion to share my life with, and He answered. I asked God to help me impact the youth, and He answered.

So maybe you’re like me, saying, “God, this doesn’t feel like I thought it would.”

And what if He gently replied, “Faith was never about feeling. It was always about knowing—and choosing to stand anyway.”

Weekly Scripture

“Now faith is confidence in what we hope for and assurance about what we do not see.”

Hebrews 11:1

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Morgan Tracy J. is the founder of HDC. She believes every woman should be empowered through the Word of God.