Walking towards the stage. My hands are sweating, and I am hoping and praying that God shows up through this message. I see the eyes of every person in the room looking at me. I feel scared and nervous because I can’t run back to who I once was. I have to stand here and show up for my purpose.
The next moment, I begin to open my Bible and pull out my pages of notes. The big projector behind me and the lights shining before me are all really a lot. I could feel myself still timid, and then I began to pray. Before I know it, I am at peace and the message begins.
It’s just me, my Bible, a microphone, and maybe 70 people, eyes locked on me. And before I can think, the Holy Spirit takes over. I minister on the power of allowing God to rewrite your story, and in all of that, I was standing in a part of my story that I never believed in.
I remember when I first got called to ministry. God said, “You will speak to women all around the world”. Now, this felt far-fetched because I was a 22-year-old girl with no ministry experience, no desire for ministry, and living with my boyfriend at that time. However, nine years later I am on a stage ministering to women.
The only thing I can tell you is to trust God when He begins to whisper a new story to you. This new story of my life of ministry God began whispering to me at 22, and showing me signs of it. But I had no clue how all the pieces would come together. Honestly, I caused myself many headaches and sleepless nights wondering how I could ever make this thing happen.
The truth is, it was never up to me to figure it out. I was just meant to believe His word and watch it come to fruition. When God begins to tell you a new story, it feels impossible to believe. Your question is, “who me??” And you think to yourself, “I can’t because I don’t have the teaching, the money, the connections, the education, etc.” The list goes on and on. But you forgot…you only need one thing….God! God is in your corner, and if you have God, you have quite a lot.
I shared this with you because I'm still that scared, nervous, timid 22-year-old woman who feels unqualified and unready. The only difference now is, I know how to lean on God for strength, answers, and help. I don’t allow my fears to talk me out of my calling. I hope you realize that it won’t get easier, you’ll just become stronger and more equipped to carry your cross.
I am praying for you that you, too, will allow God to rewrite your story.
"The greatest among you will be your servant. For those who exalt themselves will be humbled, and those who humble themselves will be exalted."
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