Feeling anxious, and I wonder if it’s caused by the pile of clothes sitting on the counter? Or the laundry I haven't got to in weeks? Either way, I feel anxious. The pain of anxiety hits my back and stomach. I stop writing and begin to pray. I tend to get frustrated thinking if the pain went away, it could make this writing process a little easier. But I’ve learned throughout the years not to allow a bad season, anxiety, financial loss, or even breakups to stop me from moving forward in faith and the will of God.
When a major life crisis would hit, I would want to throw in the towel. That is until I got solace and peace while working on my purpose. My life could be going crazy, but the vision was still the same. My money could be sparse, but the vision was the same. No one could’ve been watching my weekly videos, but my vision was the same. Vision is a path that gives us hope for our future. It clears the fog of life and gives you a faith that stands no matter the season. Each photo represents different seasons of my life, and how I continued with the vision.
The top picture is right after I flunked out of college and lost financial aid. Those two years were my most testing years, but those two years are also how God birthed a ministry. The next photo represents my little home office in small-town Wright City, Oklahoma. At twenty-five, I was still living with my parents and, even though I felt behind in life, it didn’t stop me from pursuing the vision. On random days I’d grab my camera and tripod. I would find a place that felt right, take photos, and shoot a video for my YouTube© channel. No microphone, no help, just me and my vision. These videos would begin to inspire thousands of people.
My hope is you realize the same anxious feelings I feel today, I felt back then. Although, my life has evolved, and I’m no longer just that girl writing blogs in her college dorm room. I still get anxious, feel the sharp pain of anxiety, but I don’t allow it to stop me.
While writing this blog, the pain was real, and now by the end of it, I’m settled. My vision has always helped me and centered me when I’ve gotten lost in creating and producing the vision.
Your struggles are not yours alone, and the gifts you have inside of you will be the tools you need to still keep going throughout any season and any storm. You got this, girl.